


Nudges

by Nemamka



Category: Original Work
Genre: Other, Poems, Poetry
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-02-15
Updated: 2017-07-26
Packaged: 2018-09-24 15:43:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 1,357
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9768641
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nemamka/pseuds/Nemamka
Summary: All my original poems. Various topics and forms, enjoy!





	1. Question

Is it madness

is it love

craving to find

god above

is it whispers

is it true

can I hope for

faith in you

where’s your guidance

where’s your guard

how on earth can

you stand tall

when it’s over

when it’s sad

will you lean

over my head

bring me flowers

bring me life

so that it can

all be fine

can you hear it

can you see

all that you have

done to me

 

Jan 21, 2013


	2. Overwhelmed

I’m drowning

I’m drowning

Before realizing

I’ve always been a shark

Rescue me from the dark

Shadows following -

Ever borrowing

Time and space and soul

Always wanting more

Then I see

Then I see

No uniquity

We are all the same -

When you say my name

I just need you whole

Sneak in every pore

Come what may

Come what may

You’re the tiger’s prey

Mirror in her eye

Try to stay alive

Breathe in all she gives -

Nevermind the risks

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oct 26, 2013


	3. Cigarette

There’s something about the cigarettes he lights  
There’s something about the funny way he lies  
… To himself when he tells that he doesn’t care  
That nothing matters cause the world isn’t fair. 

Try to tell him that flowers still grow  
Try to teach him no shade to throw  
… Use that spark in him so shine  
Brigther than the gasoline line.

Step over it, cross it slowly  
Let is pass to a memory softly.  
… Reaching back he strokes the last flame  
Smiling as his soul’ll never tame. 

Reach back and light another, leaving.  
… Crush it out and don’t stop feeling

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Jan 10, 2015


	4. Shell

I don’t remember the way I should

So many people, so many places.

Couldn’t see from the flying mud

But boy, do they haunt me, the faces.

.

I don’t remember the way I should

It’s too fuzzy and in fast-forward

Repetitive muscle work’s what

Got me a shiny new award.

.

I don’t remember the way

Seen more maps than could count

Ain’t got no good bearings now

‘S why I don’t go fish or hunt.

.

I don’t remember the way. 

Got a nasty hit on the head.

Short time it was, you might say

Never touched again so much lead.

.

I don’t remember

… How’d we get home?

Water doesn’t taste

Just the same.

.

I don’t remember…

Just got this strange

Necklace with

My name.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mar 27, 2015


	5. At the Gates

At the gates of a bar I’m splitting in two.  
How do you suppose we should go in to  
Enjoy a sip of whisky or beer  
‘Cause I’m freezing my ass off out here.

What is the way we will get in  
Into this famous town’s inn  
To taste the spices of rotgut gin  
And follow it with the heavenly sin

Of gambling, playing, wasting our time  
Who cares, honestly, when it feels so prime?  
We’re winning again! but not so fast -  
Ah, let those kids have one chance at last.

Which method will come to our aid  
When we decide to finally invade?  
By what means should we penetrate  
And pass on through the big bar gate?

Shall I go first or will you proceed?  
‘Cause it’s such an overmasculine deed  
To go. through. a door. Appeareth the Man!  
Whatever happened to chivalry, then?

At the gates of a bar I’m flabbergasted.  
I’m on the floor without getting wasted.  
There are rules that I’ve never heard of, it’s true;  
Then there are fools funnier than most, like you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Jun 18, 2015


	6. Warpaint

I paint war  
and with war I paint.  
I am human  
no less than saint.

Colorful to go unseen  
My face, your green screen

I paint war  
and with war I paint  
I scream until  
I almost faint

Camouflaged yet sticking out  
Only the most silent shout

I paint war  
and with war I paint  
Where there’s fire  
there’s complaint

but how do you plan to stop  
falling off your own rooftop

I paint war  
and with war I paint  
caress-breaking   
the constraint

What is real is really rare  
but they tell it’s only fair

I paint war  
and with war I paint.

I am human.  
More than saint.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sep 28, 2016


	7. Sol Reason

What is religion? Religion is merit

Not necessarily something you inherit

You wanna talk religion? I’ll tell about mine

The fourth dimension that is so precious - Time.

We measure our world in one understanding

That the Earth floats around that radiant sweet thing

It’s so glowy some call it the He-King

In my dictionary it just means no heating

But I do adore him, the colour, the gases

He’s calling me - or maybe it’s the pulling our asses

With him with the greatest gravity

This one little rock has ever seen

Look at it! No, don’t, the light can blind you

Go under it - not long, it can burn through

Skin and bones and leaves and mountains

Everything moves ‘cause he’s up and shining

Have you ever really seen him rise?

Rainbow is the true colour of the sky

At the wake of the world - a human concept

To start their daily struggles and contest 

But to actually put my blabber in context

What I’m trying really hard here to confess

Is my love for the Sun.

How many pointed star, doesn’t matter,

Provider of light to see the world better,

He never turns his back, never hides.

(It’s evil clouds that sometimes trick our eyes.)

I adore him in the summer when it’s freaking high noon,

 _but do you want to know why I’m like super obsessed with it like for real, why I’m talking about a space orb like a fucking miracle, because_

I love him most for showing me the Moon.


	8. But then again

But then again, maybe  
snapping at me  
“why’d you put your phone away so quickly?”  
doesn’t build  
any more trust  
in either of us  
whatsoever.

\- the end of a conversation that’s been long over


	9. Hooks in my skin

Draw back  
drag to the side   
ground  
restrain and drown. 

And I can’t be mad  
at two of them  
who make my lips curl u-upwards


	10. Drunk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> some surreal inspiration from [metalkiralylany](http://archiveofourown.org/users/metalkiralylany)'s words

We got drunk on bad grammar   
Can’t believe it’s our mother tongue   
Inside our mouths, and yet each word  
Can turn over a world. 

We kissed ourselves drunk on bad grammar  
Licking the prefix away  
Up and down race, that is all  
When you watch the tone fall. 

We overdosed on bad grammar  
The weakness a witness to our strength  
We wonder why we’re still tense  
Trying to make sense. 

We got wasted on bad grammar  
Run over by clauses unclosed   
Spaced out on toxic bad grammar  
And yet on we stammer.


	11. Honest

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> dissociation

Honest smiles find their way back onto my face   
Right, right… I’m awake.  
The steel bars of mascara a fence,  
Round shallow, muddy green lakes.

But honest tears break and form the lace  
Connecting nonexistent freckles  
The corner of my joy reaches up to catch them  
And they chuckle in the sneaky wrinkles. 

I’m not afraid of this, I’m just saying  
It scares me to feel so much sometimes.  
But I’m the happiest and I want to let them  
Shine like their cousins in the skies. 

The salt just makes it so much funnier.   
Of course they couldn’t be sweet.   
It fits to be so incongruous  
When mind and soul finally meet. 

So I’ll gladly feel them down  
The longest trip from eye to chin  
stumble  
run  
and fall  
none of it counts as sin.

I’ll line them up like pearls   
To lock in the shell of a heart  
and promise  
pledge  
and vow  
to turn them into art.


	12. Bitter

You promised me the world with you in it

You didn’t say I’d have to repaint the whole thing.

You gave me all the wrong colours, goddamnit! 

Now emptied out, only echoes stay to ring. 

 

You frowned at the real and the warm stuff

How ironic. You said you wanted just that. 

I admit, I was always a bit rough

But for you, anyone could raise a hat.

 

Why was it always my fault 

That my metaphorical knees didn’t bend? 

Just because I didn’t always shout

That I had wounds, too, to tend.

 

Through all my struggles and hardships

My best trait is still saying no. 

Had you not been such a halfwit

You would have begged me to let you go.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> inspired by a wonderful [Yuri!!! on Ice fic](http://archiveofourown.org/works/9409733)  
> The first line is a quote from [chapter 4](http://archiveofourown.org/works/9409733/chapters/22434872), towards the end.   
> it's not about them, it's... about me, but I mean, you interpret the way you feel like :3


End file.
